What Is Really Holding You Back?

"I can do that later, it needs to be the right time, I am not ready,..." Do you find all kinds of excuses why not to do what you need to do? Are you procrastinating?

After you catch yourself making excuses, congratulate yourself on the awareness! Being honest with yourself is the hardest part. If you are not sure if you are procrastinating then read this blog on how to recognize procrastination.

The next steps: start evaluating what is really holding you back. Ask yourself the three questions below. If you answer any or multiple questions with yes, then make a shift (see below)

QUESTIONS:

1. Am I worried that by moving forward that I will lose/miss out on something that I had? Are you afraid that with the change you will lose something that is important to you?

Examples: Maybe you need to have an uncomfortable conversation and you are afraid that it may impact a relationship. Maybe by taking a new job you will get paid more but worry that you might not be as happy anymore.

2. Am I worried that I can't do it? Are you afraid of the process?

Examples: Maybe your task requires you to learn a new skill and you are not trusting your skill level yet. Do you think that it is too hard? Maybe you know that you have to compromise along the way and you are not sure if you can handle it.

3. Am I worried about the outcome? Are you worried that the "grass will not be greener"?

Examples: Maybe you are putting a lot of work into your task but start procrastinating because your start doubting the outcome. Maybe it will not be as good as you thought it will be.

SHIFT:

Write down what you think you will lose or miss out on, what exactly is challenging in the process, and/or what outcome you fear.

Be as specific as you can and then pick one worry and create an action plan or shift a limiting belief that you may have.

Examples:

- identifying a skill that you need to learn and how and when you will learn it (to conquer process worries)

- celebrating your accomplishments along the way (to conquer outcome worries)

- plan a conversation and figure out ahead of time how to communicate that you care deeply about the relationship (to conquer loss worries)